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fluxhzard:

Gender Identity + Queerness

This is an extremely intimate and personal piece used as an outlet for closer understanding and the ability to accept and love myself.

This series is to demonstrate how I view myself on a daily basis. Within the last eight months or so, I have been exposing myself to how others view their gender identity and how might it help sort out my own questions of gender identity.

The popular understanding of gender is its direct correlation to an individual’s birth sex, but gender is more than that. It is one’s mind and how they perceive, view themselves regardless of what’s downstairs.

“Okay, you have a penis, therefore you are male.”

Ummm.. yeah no. That isn’t how it works. It may be difficult at first to understand, but if people gave it a chance, open up their minds, it is rather easy. It’s easy when most people grow up with genitalia that matches up with what’s inside their heads. It’s been determined at birth, but that’s not always the case. 

I’ll use myself as an example.
I grew up knowing there was something different in the way I saw myself. I wasn’t aware of what it was exactly, but I knew something was off. I grew up with my parents and relatives constantly bombarding me with what to wear, why I should wear it because I was born with a vagina.

Okay.

But, what happens when my earliest memory is of how confused I was? I felt male. I felt like a boy just in the wrong body. I wasn’t allowed to always wear pants and shorts and felt extremely sad when forced to wear dresses or skirts. It felt uncomfortable. I felt trapped under these social constructs. I didn’t understand why because I had female body parts that I had to abide by these rules. To me, my ‘lady’ parts didn’t matter nor found its ability to dictate what I was allowed to wear or play.

Growing up with that is difficult and only recently have I started to take what society has taught me and re-learning what gender really means to me. As of now, I view myself as both genders. There are days where I feel masculine and there are days where I feel feminine. In the future, I aim to grow more comfortable and portray myself as masculine as I can or genderless, gender neutral. But, I think the most valuable thing I’ve learn from exploring my own gender identity is that gender is flexible, it is fluid and changing.

These are the more reserved images to this series (except for that nipple slip, but I’m okay with that. Enjoy my nipple.) Anyway, I do not feel comfortable having my boobs fully exposed because the internet is a scary place. But, if you’re interested and I do not find you a creep, send me a message and I’ll send you a private link to the full series. 

***Disclaimer: I do not represent all genderqueer individuals. This is based on my own experiences and explains only me.

‘Til next time,
V.
Fluxhzard

VIXIV / Facebook / Instagram: Fluxhzard / Flickr

Thank you for sharing this with us Viviann. Your work is amazing, you are amazing and I cant wait to see what you will do in the next few years. future bestiez 4 lyfe

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